“I think the world of you…and you know what condition the world is in today.” — Henny Youngman, Henny Youngman’s Bar Jokes, Bar Bets and Bar Tricks
“When I say that Descartes consecrated doubt, you must remember that it was that sort of doubt which Goethe has called ‘the active scepticism, whose whole aim is to conquer itself’; and not that other sort which is born of flippancy and ignorance, and whose aim is only to perpetuate itself, as an excuse for idleness and indifference.” — Thomas Huxley, “On Descartes,” Lay Sermons, Addresses, and Reviews
“Doubt is long-winded. Certainty is brief.” — Mason Cooley, City Aphorisms, Sixth Selection (1989)
Typical, predictable. The pot is empty. Two days prior it was the blueberries. Others are afterthoughts for her.
For stews, I like chunky (chopped yet recognizable) garlic. They get a few seconds to themselves in duck fat.
Food is where it is most obvious. Even the selfless can speak of themselves for hours. Actions speak truer than words.
Two potatoes, medium sized. Why do recipes always call for large of everything? One medium sized potato per serving is just right.
She’d deny it, listing examples of generosity. She doesn’t understand that gifting leftovers is not generous. It’s just the thoughtful use of surplus. Free brownie points with a bonus for claiming waste reduction.
Two carrots. Like the garlic, chopped in chunks. Like the potatoes, medium sized.
Lights mirror her self-image. They’re on, all day long, wherever she goes. Then, even when she is first, to save energy, she turns them all off when going to bed.
A large splash of Porto for the stew. A smaller dash, enough to satisfy the ritual, for the cook.
A Hobbesian view of humanity, a belief that offense is the best defense. Her apologetics well rehearsed.
The last ingredient, gourmet chunky dog food, sold with the slogan “BIG Chunks for the BIG dog.” Rinsed to remove the sauce.
Beef is beef. It’s symbolic. Who said that revenge is best served cold?
“Jay-ake. Earth to Jake. Helloooo.”
“Huh? Sorry. I was playing with an idea. … For a story. The ending changes based on the reader’s view of the trustworthiness of the narrator.”
“I was telling you that the leftovers are in the fridge. I didn’t know at what time you would come home or whether you would have already eaten.”
“Single-minded monists, ruthless fanatics, men possessed by an all-embracing coherent vision do not know the doubts and agonies of those who cannot wholly blind themselves to reality.” — Isaiah Berlin, Four Essays on Liberty